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The Bra Whisperer

Ever see those Oprahs where women who think they know their bra sizes get sized and find out they really don't?

How in the world can a woman not know her own bra size? I always thought that was so idiotic.

Well, I'm an idiot. (As if you didn't know that already.) But, turns out there's more than one idiot in our house.

You know how men always think they can discern a woman's bra size? (Oh please, oh please: Tell me I'm not the only woman married to one of those.) Well, Tim is not immune to priding himself on that score. Maybe it's a physics thing.

In any event, when I went to my local Nordstrom for a bra last weekend, it was specifically to get sized. I knew what I'd been wearing for years wasn't quite right, but I certainly had no idea how wrong it was.

Meet June, the Bra Whisperer (that really is what they call her). She measured me, listened to my preference for styles, then went in search of the perfect slings and hammocks to meet my needs. But, before she left the dressing room, I had to know. I'd been wearing a 34C for decades.

"What size am I?" I asked.

"You're a 34 triple" she replied.

"Triple what?"


"DDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD???????????" (Well, OK. Actually DDD.) I was shocked. Just like those idiots on Oprah.

June gave me an uncomfortable smile, as if she was used to women being horrified when they found out their true sizes. I guess she wasn't use to me.

"Triple D!" I did a little dance with my thumbs up. "Way to go!!!!" (Look, I was totally flat-chested until my second year of college. Some things just stick.)

When I got home, I proudly informed Tim of my new Triple status. He was just as shocked as I. Unfortunately, he simply refuses to admit he was wrong and goes around muttering about "bra inflation." (I guess that's better than refering to June as "The Boob Wrangler.")

My new bras are so comfortable (including my new exercise one), Tim wants to know if this will induce me to get dressed more frequently. I'm pleased, therefore, to announce he remains the sole idiot in the house.

On March 11th, all Nordstrom lingerie deparments will be hosting Nordstrom Fits America. If you buy a bra, proceeds go to breast cancer research. They're taking appointments now. So, get fit, ladies! (Just don't tell your men. I'm not sure they can handle the information quite as well as we can.)

Comments (15)

Eric Riback:

And I used to respect Tim.

And I used to believe him!


I had almost the same experience when I got sized a few months ago! I'd been wearing the same cup size all my adult life, just changing the number as I gained (ugh) or lost (yay!) weight. Turns out I was COMPLETELY wrong. It's definitely worth doing!

It's really quite amazing.

Totally amazing! Funny coincidence-- my daughter told me she was on her way to Nordstrom's today for bras! I asked if they had the best selection. She said, "No, they have the best fitters. People at Macy's are no help at all." The post mortem: she left there happy, with lots of new bras. I guess it's my turn.

I've never been fitted anywhere else, but since Oprah recommended Nordstrom...

I had a "professional bra fitting" this year, and it seriously changed my life. Clothes look much better when your bra fits. But I was freaked out by the size. Now I'm even more freaked out. I'm way fatter than you.

38DD. Uuuuuugggghhhh!!!!

It's just our BOOBs that are fat. Well, and my butt. I seriously need a butt whisperer.

I'm looking forward to going to my book club next week and showing off my new look - I bet they think I had the girls surgically lifted. Clothes really do look so much better. Now, if I could just get Tim to quit muttering. Was Adam shocked, too? Although really, what could our husbands say? "Yeah, I always thought you had fat boobs."

OK, this was totally adorable. :-)

Thanks, Jill - but practical, too, I hope! Ladies, size thyselves!

The psychological ramifications are pretty amazing, as well. I walked fairly straight before this. Now, I'm constantly toppling over.


Hi Doreen, long time no comment. It's great seeing that you are as feisty and fun as ever. I actually left a brilliant comment here last night but when I checked back it wasn't here and now my brilliance has faded. A bra whisperer...I need one too. I keep eyeballing my size increases instead of actually finding out what I need. Robin, according to the bras I am now wearing, you and I wear the same size. This can't be right because your boobs always look so good and right for your size, and mine are so big and out of control, like fleshy aliens have glommed themselves onto my chest and refuse to let go. Bra whisperer at Nordstroms, here I come...

Polly, I did not get any other comment from you. These nets thingys...

My brilliance fades all the time. Really, it does. What was I saying?

I'm thinking there must be some "bra inflation." I remember reading somewhere, some years ago, that what we consider dress sizes of 8 or 10 or 12, etc these days are really larger than the same sizes years ago. Since, as a country, we're getting bigger, it makes sense to me that our boobs are, too. (Although I'm not sure that the same holds true for men's equivalent, much to their dismay.)

Only in their minds, Doreen, only in their minds...

The Queen of the Road shows off the Bra Whisperer's expertise: http://twitpic.com/15uxii

Women should choose the right size of bra. It's found that wrong size of bra cause shoulder ache, backache, and neck pain. Bra can affect women's health. So choose the right one for yourself.

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This page contains a single entry from the blog posted on February 21, 2010 5:03 PM.

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