This Seattle book club has two members who own boats. One even lives on hers.

Needless to say, I'm not telling Tim. For those of you who haven't been following the blog (and why is that?) or read the book (don't worry, I'm not even talking to you*) that's because his next idiotic dream is to live on a boat. We had enough disasters on dry land in a bus, so I don't want to encourage him. Not that it matters: I keep catching him surfing the internet for sailboat sites.

Why can't I have a normal husband who just surfs for porn? (Regular blog readers will have heard that lament before.*)

Maybe I should tell him about this book group, because as one of the boat ladies said, "Take a cold shower while you rip up $100 bills. If you like that, you'll like living on a boat."

Yes, I think I will make him look at this post, after all. But, you know Tim. The only way he'll be interested in anything on a computer is if it's in a file named, "My hot lesbian fantasies."*

Thanks for the lovely discussion, ladies as well as the seafaring info. I'll know whether to really be thankful - or not - depending on how Tim reacts. But, knowing him, it's probably gonna be
"Ahoy Maties!" for me.

*See what you're missing?

This lovely book club in Lancaster, PA met in their PJs just for me!

Back Row: Donna, Marti, Stephanie, Ruth. Front Row: Stephanie (the hostess, with honorable mention to her husband, Rodney, who made a cameo appearance on the phone), Linda, Verna, Ruth.

If I had known how spiffy they looked, I might have worn a nicer pair than the ratty one I had on when I called. (And no, you won't be seeing a picture of that.) Does anyone else have such nice (meaning not faded, no holes) PJs? I may need to do some shopping.

The gals know each other from church and have been meeting for five years. Donna, the RVer in the group, picked the book on the recommendation of another book club (you know I love hearing that).

Two of the members, Verna and Joanne, work for Auntie Anne's Pretzels. Mmmmm. Those delectable soft pretzels you get in the mall. (I really gotta go PJ shopping now, especially as I just drooled on my very ratty PJs.) As a former New Yorker, I like mine warm with mustard.

Verna informed me she's a "pretzel trainer." That was a stumper. I couldn't help asking, "And, what exactly do pretzels need to be trained to do?" (As if you needed any more proof that I'm concrete as a sidewalk.) She then clarified she trains the people in the stores. Oh. So, by the time Joanne told me she makes the pretzels, I really was joking when I asked, "Make them do what?"

In any event, I hope you enjoyed speaking with me as much as I did you, ladies. And, Project Nerd (that's my nickname for my husband, Ruth) and I will take you up on a buggy ride when we're next in your Amish neck of the woods.

Queen On!

Meeting for twelve years and it seems, even after reading QUEEN OF THE ROAD, they refuse to give up.

(Here they are, enjoying their Secession Swizzles.)

Although one member, Jody, may. She told me that after reading the book, she decided to do the RV thing with her husband once the kids graduate. That's fine, Jody, as long as you don't end up blaming me.

Gretchen also wants to do the RV thing once her daughter graduates and Cathy and her family already RV in the summer.

Funny how after you become an "RV person" you notice how many of them there are. And, if this book club is any indication, we're spreading. Like pod people.

Yep, Sharon, Diane, Laurene and Maggie: Your time will come.

Mwa ha ha ha ha!

That's what this lovely book club in North Platte, NE calls themselves. They got the name from Lance Armstrong's book (which, as it so happens, my fabulo editor, Stacy Creamer, edited). Like my own club, they discuss the book, but then, as they put it, "digress" since they're all friends.

Wouldn't have it any othe way, myself.

Back row, left to right: Judy Thompson, Connie Brittan, Ellie McClymont, Deb Gulzow, Julie McChesney Front row, left to right: Marge Thomas, Lois Books, Marilyn Haynes, Sherry Polk Absent that night: Betty Gilsdorf, Twila Conell and Sherry Erickson

I think the best books teach us something about ourselves we didn't know.

Well, I don't know if my book did that for this Nebraska club, but my phone call sure did.

I like starting the calls by asking everyone to go around and introduce themselves. And, guess what? In doing so, Julie realized she was the only club member who was not a teacher.

Unfortunately for her, she used to work in mental health. But, let's not feel too bad for Julie, as like almost everyone else in this group, she's retired! (Deb, the hostess being the exception. But, don't feel too bad for her, either: she's retiring next year.) I guess that's why they all look so relaxed and happy.

Most of the retired teachers in this group taught English, so the heat was on. Do you have any idea how intimidating that is for a writer?

Fortunately, this group was very kind about QUEEN OF THE ROAD. Or, maybe they were just being polite. I did say they're from Nebraska, didn't I?

If a book club of English teachers from my former home of New York City ever wants me to call in, forgetaboutit!

When Tim came home last night from grocery shopping (yes, he does that, too), I unpacked this:

I reached for my phaser and set it to "kill." (If you doubt I always have it at the ready nowadays, you haven't read the recent entries about the wild, ferocious animals traipsing through our backyard.)

Fortunately, Tim told me to "stand down." "Fortunately," because he had other plans for this mutant mushroom that I still maintain could have sucked out our brains while we slept:

Good thing I'm not responsible for our sustenance (or much of anything else, I know you're thinking) around here.

Oh my, is that a mouthful or what?

I love this picture. It's so gratifying to see people actually take what I'm saying seriously (or at least, give the apearance of doing so).

Here's another:

That's Mary, the librarian's, RV. Nice rig, Mary! (Sorry for the technical jargon, folks. What do you want from me?) She tells me it's for sale. Any takers? Say so in a comment and Mary will connect with you directly.

Anyway, this library book club has been meeting in Mecosta, MI for nine years. Mary emailed me afterwards to say, "3 of our gals stayed out of the room because they had not yet had time to read the book. (They will now!)" Oh, ladies. Would this really have ruined the ending? I mean, obviously I survived the whole "bus thing," unless you normally host seances at the library?

Hmmm. That's not a bad idea. I mean, I'd love to meet my past life selves: Cleopatra, Nefertiti, etc. (Yeah, I know, everyone always thinks she was a queen in a past life. But, since I truly am one in this one, it's gotta come from somewhere, no? From my publisher you say? Off with your head!)

Thanks so much for the lovely discussion, ladies. And, Mary: thank you for picking QUEEN OF THE ROAD and for the invite to your RV park in Casa Grande, AZ. You never know, you just might see us barreling down the road someday. And, as I always say, if that happens: Feel free to say hello, or run for your life - whichever seems more appropriate at the time.

This fabulous book club has been meeting for five years at the Stark County District Library's
Lake Community Branch in Uniontown, OH. How do I know they're fabulous? Well, aside from the fact that they picked QUEEN OF THE ROAD to read (what do you want from me?) they also sure know how to name themselves. I mean, "Booked on Sundays"? I'm horrendous at titles, so I may have to consult them before my next book.

In addition to their interesting questions, one of the members actually went to the same summer camp I did, Cejwin, in Port Jervis, NY. Ellen was there slightly before my time, in a shall we say, more innocent age, and it was fun comparing notes.

Thanks so much for a thoroughly enjoyable chat, ladies! And, special mention to Jodie Hawkins, Adult Programmer, who chose the book in the first place.

Queen on!

I meant giving your Queen as a gift, not giving your Queen a gift, but come to think of it, that's just fine, too.

For laughs with a little inspiration thrown in (or as Denver Magazine declared, "Eat, Pray, Love - without the depression") give a signed copy of QUEEN OF THE ROAD. Perfect as a stocking stuffer or other holiday gift - even for yourself!

Email me (hit the "contact me" link on the right) for free, signed bookplates! (As many as you like, but more than 10, I may get a restraining order.)

Adorable, no? Complete with peel-and-stick backs that paste right in the book. Your Queen, Our Royal Coach, in Alaska. What could be bad? (My handwriting, I know. Sigh.)

Don’t forget to include the first name of whoever you would like the bookplate made out to (for men, I'll usually write, "Enjoy the ride!", but if you have a preference, as long as it's PG, I'm game) as well as your address. Postage is on me! (Yes, that’s all you’re getting for the holidays. What do you want from me?)

If you’d rather have an actual signed book, I’m happy to oblige, but you’ll have to pony up via paypal, check or credit card for the book and postage. Email me and we’ll work it out.

Queen on and happy holidays! You know what I’m making for both holiday meals, right? Reservations, of course! (Oh, you know me so well, don't you?)

Those of you who are regular readers of this blog (thank you!) or have read the book (and if not... must I keep asking why not?) know that I always make my usual for the holidays - reservations. So, I thought I'd show you where exactly those reservations have usually been made since we moved to Boulder 16 years ago: The Hotel Boulderado, which celebrates its centennial this year.

As their website states:

The Hotel Boulderado has been a downtown Boulder landmark since it opened on New Year's Day, 1909. Back in 1905, when Boulder, a city of 8,000 was not growing quickly enough, the only way that city council members felt they could improve their lot was to provide the "comfort of a first class hotel." Stock was advertised at $100 a share to raise the necessary funds. A spokesperson for the Commercial Association (forerunner to the Chamber of Commerce) said, "We have invested our money in the enterprise because it represents Boulder's greatest need. We shall be glad of returns, but shall be infinitely gladder if we secure a hotel of such beauty of proportions and architectural design that it will stand as a monument to her permanency and pride in her enterprises. Let it be the Hotel Beautiful."

It was named for the words "Boulder" and "Colorado" so that no guest would forget where he had stayed. To provide its guests with every human comfort, all bedrooms were fitted with light fixtures that ran on both natural gas and electricity. Unseen men were busy 24 hours a day stoking the huge coal furnace to provide hot water and to keep the hotel evenly heated, and telephones were installed in most of the 75 rooms. Rooms varied in price from $1.00 to $2.50 per day.

Famous guests included Helen Keller, Douglas Fairbanks, Ethel Barrymore, and Louis Armstrong.

Guess that means I'm the only royal to ever visit. Sniff.

Anyway, we've always loved the hotel. If you want a peek at its combination of Italian Renaissance and Spanish Revival architecture, do see the website.

Have no fear, however, for those of you too lazy to click on that link (I knew there was a reason we got along so well), I took this interior picture:

Note the "the original cantilevered cherrywood staircase, extending from the basement all the way to the fifth floor." Also note the stained glass canopy ceiling. Normally, there's a huge Christmas tree in the center of the lobby, which stretches all the way up to that ceiling. This year, it hadn't been delivered yet, so I'll have to go back sometime and take a picture of it for you. (Quite the hardship, I know.)

Tim and I have made Thanksgiving dinner at Q's (the hotel's restaurant) a holiday tradition, whenever we're in town.

A lot of families seem to do the same. As a result, we enjoy being in a family atmosphere for the holiday, without actually having to be around family. Can you blame me? The Queen Mother spent Thanksgiving with my extremely religious, ultra-orthodox cousins who brought kosher Chinese food from their favorite place, Cho-Sen (get it?), as no one wanted turkey. (I, personally, want turkey on Thanksgiving. And, turkey is what we got, along with beet salad and chocolate pecan burbon pie. Yum!)

My relatives are apparently so far removed from secular life, they don't even know that Jews are supposed to eat Chinese food on Xmas, not Thanksgiving.

Sheesh.

On Black Friday, my darling husband insisted we go to the mall "for the spectacle of it." We hadn't been to a mall in a long time and each only made out with one item from the Nordstrom Rack.

Frankly, that was enough.

Tim got a drastically reduced sweater and I got these fabulo gloves (which I later saw at Dillards for almost double the price):

Tim took that picture the next night just before we walked downtown for dinner. The gloves are thinsulate, and since my hands are always cold when I wear the gloves I already owned, I hoped these would do the trick. They did. And no, I'm not sporting some new, weird, Princess Leia hairstyle. Those are ear muffs. Tim says they make me "look like a simp," but I don't care. They keep my ears warm. Now, if I could just find some animal print ones....

Happy holidays, everyone!